What to Do if My Partner has Different Parenting Styles
Never fear, parenting different than your partner is not going to mess your children up. Remember building relationships is at the core of parenting with Love and Logic. Communication, respect and grace will go a long way when you don’t see eye to eye in your parenting style with your partner. Here is what Charles Fay has to say about that:
“There is no immunity against Kid Related Marital Friction (KRMF). While brief, low-intensity episodes of K.R.M.F are probably unavoidable…and may even give kids a healthy picture of human relationships…protracted and intense ones can cause lasting pain for everyone involved.
The source of most unhealthy…and unnecessary…friction comes from the myth that parents always have to be on the “same page” when it comes to their parenting styles. When we stumble onto this rocky path, our primary objective focuses on changing the person we believed was wonderful enough to marry. Ironic! Like a wedge splitting a log, this trap tears us and our kids apart.
Here are some tips for when you don’t agree with your spouse on parenting: • Put your marriage first. Kids behave better in the context of a healthy, supportive marriage.
• Celebrate your agreement over core values. Write these down. You’ll likely discover more agreement than you thought.
• Agree to parent differently as long as you are both supporting these values. There are a lot of different ways to get the job done.
• Don’t allow your kids to manipulate you against your spouse.
• Never take sides with your kids or sabotage your spouse’s actions.
Putting three of these tips into practice, can avoid a lot of KRMF.”
Be a fantastically, fun family! We are here for you.