Virginia Beaver

Life Coach and Trainer

Summer Fun Without Screens – Interaction with children is the most important thing

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Kids playing with hoola hoops.

Summer Fun Without the Screens

Tips for Summer Fun without Screens

Our Children Want/Need Interaction With Us

 

Some of you may have heard about the dangers of too much “screen” time for children.  If not you can read about them here.  The important thing to know is that screens cannot replace human interaction.   We are pack animals and we need each other!  Children especially, need our touch, our attention and need to be able to look into our eyes and see that they are okay.  To learn how to connect with the most important people in your life, get my FREE “5 Keys to Connecting.”

 

Here are some inexpensive activities without screens:

 

Music with Wooden spoon and a pan

Organizing cabinets, sorting small objects by color or shape

Freeze tag

Red-light, green-light

Baking or cleaning

Planting tomatoes or flowers

Creating grocery list and going shopping

Play “I Spy” with colors or objects

Chalk on the Sidewalk

Bubbles or water guns in the yard

Singing and Dancing

 

Toddlers act out because the most important thing to them is our attention and they don’t know how to ask for it.    You can read about that in my blog “When Children Act Out”.  We all want to feel connected, accepted and appreciated.  One way to give a toddler attention is to sit with them for at least 15 minutes a day, playing something with them on their level.  Being connected with them and being fully present is a win-win because you both feel accepted, appreciated and loved.

 

Teenagers act out because they are looking for acceptance and approval. They want to feel accepted and loved even when they make mistakes.  When we model unconditional love with our communication and respect, they feel accepted and connected.  If you want help with communication skills, setting limits, teaching responsibility, or for ideas for spending time with your teen or toddler, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me.  Initial consultations are FREE!
To connect with me, go to my contact page or FB page.  Have a fantastically Fun Summer! [Read more…]

Empty Nest Syndrome – How to Cope After the Kids Leave Home

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The 6 R’s for Battling Empty Nest Syndrome

Who knows what this is?  I have heard of it before but never really understood how debilitating it could be.  I am here to tell you that Empty Nest Syndrome is real and it can be as serious as any other form of depression especially if it is compounded by major life changes.

We have had a lot going on in the last three months with moving, not having a place to call home and our children leaving the nest.  We had a foreign exchange student, our daughter and our son living with us for the last school year.  We knew everyone would be leaving in the summer but had no idea how that would really feel when they left about the same time.

Not only was the nest empty, the nest was not stationary because we moved into an RV.  I had a huge hole in my day-to-day life that was not being filled by work, dogs or even my honey.  I began to realize that this hole was familiar; it was the same emptiness as when we tragically lost our son to suicide.  The Dallas Morning News said Arnold Palmer’s death left a void.  Anyone’s death leaves a void! Void is defined as “completely empty.”  That is how I felt.

If you have ever been depressed, you know that feeling.  This was not my first dance with depression so I was not completely lost or over whelmed.  I knew what it was and why I was feeling what I was feeling, however, that didn’t make it any less real or painful.  I didn’t want to be alone and I didn’t have much energy for work.  Here are some things that helped me:

  1. Recognizing it for what it is.
  2. Respecting it and giving myself permission to mourn.
  3. Remembering that I was not alone.
  4. Rekindling friendships and connecting with others.
  5. Rejuvenating by reading, walking and/or meditating outside.
  6. Reaching out to my Life Coach.

Love is always the answer.  When we love ourselves enough to give ourselves grace, compassion and empathy, we are able to heal and come back stronger, wiser and more loving for ourselves and others.

I would love to serve you in the process of getting on the other side of any struggles you are having in your life.

How to Have the Best School Year

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10 Steps to a Great School Year with Your Child(ren)

Going back to school can be exciting and stressful for children and parents.  Here are 10 steps to the best school year, ever:

  1. Use Rule #1 Take Care of Yourself
  2. Love the child you are with – Whatever is going on with your child, it could be useful for their growth– Be non-reactive.
  3. Be Patient with yourself and others by providing empathy and grace.
  4. Keep it simple – The more activities, the more things that can go wrong.  It’s simple math, the more variables, the harder the problem.
  5. Don’t take things personal.  Your perspective is going to be different than others (child, spouse, teacher, principal, etc.) and visa-versa.
  6. If someone is upset, it is not about you.  Let it (anger, frustration and resentment) go.
  7. Housekeeping (internal and external) can wait until you have the energy and/or the time.
  8. Divvy up the chores.  Children learn responsibility and build confidence when they contribute to the household.
  9. Save the lectures/lessons for when everyone is in a good place.
  10. Have fun!

Simple yet not always easy.  It would be my honor to assist you in making this the best school year, ever.

Virginia

virginia@virginiabeaver.com

How I Moved Our Family Without Stress

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family moves with low stress

5 Things That Helped Move Our Family

Summer time can be a good time of year to move your family.  However, if you are moving yourself and you live in Texas, it can be grueling.  We just moved ourselves last month to four different destinations.  Our son moved in with my mother, and we moved our family stuff into an RV, a rental property and a house.  The rental property and our house are being renovated so some of our stuff had to be packed for storage.  As you can imagine, it has been quite an ordeal.

The hardest part was the purging, packing and figuring out what goes where.  We started in May with the hopes that we would have enough time to get moved at the end of June.  However, life got in the way and we barely made our deadline.  Remembering and practicing “Rule #1 Take Care of Yourself” we got some outside help with packing and moving the heavy furniture.

I was determined to make this process as painless as possible for everyone.  Keeping in mind that there is no such thing as a painless move and that this would be an opportunity for me to practice my relationship skills.  I also know that where there is pain, there is growth.  Here are some of the things that were helpful:

  1. Taking care of myself physically, mentally and spiritually.
  2. Preparing, planning and organizing for the move.
  3. Communication daily, hourly and sometimes even moment to moment.
  4. Being patient with myself and others by providing empathy, grace and forgiveness.
  5. Prayer and/or intention to love each other through this process.

The stress of moving can be overwhelming under any circumstance due to the work involved and loss of what is familiar.  Even when the move is for a good reason or we are excited about the new location, it can still be a challenge.  As with any challenge, it is important to be clear about what we expect and understand that our perspective may not be the same as the other people involved.

It was still hard and things did not always go as planned.  We were hot, fatigued and frustrated. My immature self wanted to have a fit and give up.  There were a few times that we got short with each other which gave us an opportunity to apologize.  For the most part, everyone was a team player and no one got mad or quit.

The move is not over and I don’t like not being settled in a home with a yard for the dogs and my office set up.  I am not sure when that will be or what it will look like. However, I am grateful that we have each other and that we are healthy!

If there is a family or personal issue that you are struggling with, it would be an honor to serve you in finding resolution and peace.

Stay Connected With Us

Testimonials

Substitute Teacher

"I am so thankful that I met Virginia and have had her for a (Love and Logic) coach. The seminars are good...
2017-02-08T17:14:04+00:00
"I am so thankful that I met Virginia and have had her for a (Love and Logic) coach. The seminars are good but they cannot cover everything. That is why it is critical to have a coach to help you when unexpected things come up. Otherwise you are left in the dark wondering “What do I do with this situation?”" Beverley

Chuck L. Rockwall, TX

There are times in our life that we need help. Virginia can help you get out of your head and...
2016-10-28T23:16:50+00:00
There are times in our life that we need help. Virginia can help you get out of your head and back into your heart.

Dave R. Richardson, TX

Virginia is awesome! I highly recommend her counsel and classes!
2016-10-28T23:16:10+00:00
Virginia is awesome! I highly recommend her counsel and classes!

Jena A. Frisco, TX

I highly recommend Virginia for anyone having difficulty inside their relationships, especially family like husband and children, but really all...
2016-10-28T23:05:56+00:00
I highly recommend Virginia for anyone having difficulty inside their relationships, especially family like husband and children, but really all your personal relationships.

MP Allen, TX

I loved the Love and Logic class. Virginia is a great teacher, she is patient and has a gift for...
2016-09-08T21:25:43+00:00
I loved the Love and Logic class. Virginia is a great teacher, she is patient and has a gift for really listening, understanding your situation, and giving you some very practical ideas so you can make time with your children more enjoyable and teach them life-long lessons.

Anonymous: Plano, TX

Felt successful with the stop arguing, ownership of problem, and enforceable statements techniques.  Overall, my stress level with kids is...
2016-05-26T16:41:36+00:00
Felt successful with the stop arguing, ownership of problem, and enforceable statements techniques.  Overall, my stress level with kids is reduced.

JG

"I took the Love and Logic course when my son was 18 months so that I could learn how to...
2016-02-29T21:26:50+00:00
"I took the Love and Logic course when my son was 18 months so that I could learn how to work with his biting and pushing and how I could better handle stressful situations. Virginia taught me through Love and Logic how to address  my son to get more successful  outcomes.   This a very effective class and I highly recommend  it for parents  of young  kiddos and older. In the class the parents  with teenagers said that their  new Love and Logic practice helped them significantly  communicate with their child by giving them the options to make choices for themselves  and for them to learn  what's right and wrong on their own terms.  I learned to calm down and tweek my approach when talking to him. Finally, he doesn't  bite and we have a much better relationship."

Encouraged Parents

"Miss Virginia is an excellent teacher. In the class, she encouraged parents to discuss among themselves and come up with...
2015-10-26T21:03:24+00:00
"Miss Virginia is an excellent teacher. In the class, she encouraged parents to discuss among themselves and come up with solutions. She also gave extra time after class to make sure we understand the ideas. I started putting those suggestions into practice. Since I am not owning my kids day-to-day problems anymore, my stress level came down significantly."

GP

Thanks so much. It's been wonderful.The format of the class was exactly what I needed. The book is good as...
2014-11-19T23:04:44+00:00
Thanks so much. It's been wonderful.The format of the class was exactly what I needed. The book is good as a reference, but the group dynamics, discussion and your lesson plan were what really made it "actionable".